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Minutes after Roberto Baggio sent his penalty into orbit, as Franco Baresi broke down in tears and members of the Brazilian backroom staff performed somersaults in gaudy shell suits that Paulie Walnuts would’ve considered beyond the pale, Brazil’s 17-year-old reserve striker walked up the steps to get his hands on World Cup. It was amongst this throng that Ronaldo first smiled at the world.

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Romario, the penalty box king who had the air of a lorry driver cruising for action in the bogs at a roadside cafe.

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Branco, the left back of the 40-yard free kick and a barnet that was lost to the world of 80s Glam Rock.

There’s Dunga, a man who rattled into tackles and played simple give and go football (which is fitting when you consider he was a mere moustache away from being the third Chuckle Brother). We have forgotten one of the Titans.īrazil’s victorious 1994 World Cup-winning squad were an enigmatic bunch. In remembering only the milestones and tragedies in our endless search for bite-sized pub-chat, we have allowed some of the greatest things ever seen on a football pitch to slip down the cracks of our bleary-eyed storytelling.

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Whole actual pubs full of men wearing ill-fitting jeans covered in today’s paint and yesterday’s curry left speechless by a bald blur with teeth like a Disney character. It was a shot of pure adrenaline that could eviscerate cynicism, shred club loyalties, and render whole pubs mute. Watching him elicited feelings like that first grope at your teenage disco or climbing a podium on your original lads holiday and reaching for those f*cking lasers. Even towards the end of his career, with millions in the bank and knees that hated him, his delight at getting on the ball and taking the p*ss was palpable. Ronaldo approached pretty much every one of his 600-odd games like a puppy who has just seen water for the first time, and is going in headfirst no matter how many times you call or whistle and, if he drowns, well f*ck it, because it was fun while it lasted. As Dads sit on sofas across the country, shaking their heads at his appearance on a Pokerstars ad which elicits murmurs of ‘Fat’ Ronaldo from the kids, we have forgotten not only that he was the most exciting player seen on a football pitch in at least the last 25 years, but that every time he crossed the white line he played with a childlike joy that is rarely seen in the paid ranks. Yet as time passes and his career becomes nothing more than a collection of YouTube videos set to appalling house music, and his deeds are crunched into numbers that are trotted out by people who prefer to lionise raw data over raw talent, we have missed the point. We can talk rabidly about the time he scored a hat-trick at Old Trafford and was serenaded with a standing ovation and we can easily recall his outrageous double-dummy that won Inter the UEFA Cup. That goal for Barcelona, his seizure on the morning of the 1998 World Cup final and resulting horror-show of a performance, the glorious redemption in the Land of the Rising Sun four years later. Of course, we all remember the big moments.

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The greatest striker of the modern era who won three FIFA World Player of the Year awards, a brace of Ballon D’Ors, and scored over 400 career goals. The bastard offspring of a beaver and a hollow point bullet who smiled at defenders before turning them to jelly. The footballer who made Sir Bobby Robson dance like your Dad at a wedding after too many Pernod and blacks. The kid who burst out of Bento Riberio and blazed a swoosh-shaped trail across Europe. Otherwise known as O Fenomeno, Originaldo and, to some heathens, Fat Ronaldo. The man, of course, was Ronaldo Luis Nazario de Lima. His fans, though, didn’t give a toss: they only cared that he was recovering from knee surgery and, all being well, would soon don club colours in his homeland. Although the case was later dropped when it appeared he’d been a victim of extortion, the escapade cost him $4.8 million in lost endorsements, led to a temporary break in his engagement to his long-term partner and saw him savagely criticised and satirised by the Brazilian media.